Friday, September 25, 2015

The Single Fathers Guide Frozen Bloody Mary

I make completely kick-ass cocktails. That's not pretentious; it's the truth. Of course, I give credit where credit is due. When I was in college, my late uncle, Jim Mattingly, gave me a chance to sling drinks to the regulars at Mattingly's Sports Bar on North Lindbergh in Florissant, Missouri where he showed me how to run a business, take care of customers, and make kick-ass cocktails. When Jim passed away two years ago, the chicken wings in Heaven got a damned bit better.

Although in New York, the gardening season is winding down, I still have a ton of tomatoes that I never use. Most of the time, I give the excess to friends, but I know a lot of those don't go to use either. Here's a novel idea: The Single Fathers Guide Frozen Bloody Mary. Excess tomatoes never had it so good.

The Single Fathers Guide
Frozen Bloody Mary

10 ounces of vodka
2-3 large tomatoes
1-2 stalks of celery
1 heaping tablespoon of horseradish
Several dashes of hot sauce
Lemon, cocktail onions, pickles, etc. (optional)

Halve tomatoes and squeeze out seeds. In a six cup blender, combine tomatoes, vodka, celery, horseradish, and hot sauce. Blend on high setting for 30 seconds or until consistency is smooth. Add ice to fill the blender pitcher. Blend on high setting again until consistency is smooth. Garnish to taste. Makes four to six awesomely cool cocktails for any warm September Southeastern Conference football Saturday, (M I Z !), or even the Big 12, Big 10, PAC 12, ACC . . .

Of course, my brothers, enjoy responsibly. Still, enjoy. You've earned it.